I read it on Facebook....

You know those people who talk about what they read on Facebook like it's some sort of place to find valid information? 

Yeah, I'm one of them. 

I started an account when it was used as a means of reconnecting with old friends or sharing pictures with family you just can't see often enough. It was great... took away some of the isolation of being a new mom without a village. 

Then it started to change. The kids started to drift away to Instagram and Snapchat and I don't even know because I'm not cool. I guess I was never "cool" and that's okay. They drifted away when the adults really took to Facebook. Everyone is so busy, even the people with a village don't get enough time to sit around a fire and chit chat. It was like parents coming home early from a vacation to find a house full of kids. The younger generation scattered to find something else to make their own. They come around now and then but more like stopping in to do laundry. Adults connected and made friends who are strangers, pen pals without the time waiting for the mail.

From where I sit an overwhelming abundance of people became reporters. It's GREAT! On a smaller level, it helps each of us get to know each other better because we get a window into things about which our friends care. On a bigger level, there are so many movements happening. There are majors in all aspects of life, with experts freely sharing knowledge. There are prayers and light and love flowing.

There are independent journalists who are able to build followings. There are house bound sick people able to discuss treatments or just be supported. There are people advertising their small businesses. There are people launching social movements from their homes. There are people helping people in so many ways, even if for nothing more than to pop in and say "Happy Birthday" or "I'm sorry that happened to you". We can get instant information if you want to know a recipe or help with a child care issue.

Boy oh boy have I read it on Facebook. I have learned more than I did in 17 years of school. I have one friend who has had a keen interest in economics his whole life. Well, he posts articles from independent sources and I read the ones that catch my eye. I have learned more from him than I ever could have without that "friending". We spent four years in high school together and I had no idea how interesting he is. His perspective is full of wisdom in things I had not a clue. I have some friends whose lives have taken them in the direction of travel. Well, I have seen things I never would have gotten to see from the perspective of someone I know. There are friends who love to cook and I have picked up some ideas and recipes. There are friends with very different political opinions than I have. Well, I have learned their perspectives. I am fine with agreeing to disagree but I do believe we should all try to understand each other. I have friends who are advocates for animals who have showed me a different kind of parenting. I have a friend from long ago who lives across the world. I get a view into her country. I have a few other friends from different countries and learn about life in those places. I have a ton of friends who are interested in health or are sick and what I have learned from them is immeasurable. I have seen countless stories of vaccine injured children, learning that we didn't hear those parents when we should have. I have learned a good bit of immunology. I have learned about post sepsis and more science than I could have had I majored in it. I have learned where to look for research. I have learned that things are not as they appear. I have learned that I lived in a naive bubble for many years. I have learned about so many different kinds of health practitioners, ones who don't hand out meds. I have read about homeschooling successes. I have read about naturally cured successes. I have read metaphysical and philosophical and historical information. I have one friend with a heart of gold who no longer lives close. I have learned how this world hurts her. I have a Canadian friend who has taught me more about the world than I would like to know some days, but I appreciate the brutal honestly and perspective of someone who is done raising her children. I learned about homebirth from a Mom I met through mold groups. I have learned about nutrition. I found a love of essential oils shared from a friend. I have learned about the human spirit. I have learned of hurts and joys I never would have seen without Facebook.  

Truth be told many of my friends are strangers. Some of these strangers have been better friends to me than my friends have been at times. I have learned that family, people from your "tribe", don't always find each other in their neighborhoods. There are a few that just feel like I have known them forever. I see their children and grandchildren and learn what's ahead or smile at what is behind.  

My husband doesn't get Facebook. He's just not that guy to do this. In our business he has the same kind of interactions because we have a lot of customers. I'm a reader more than verbally social. Facebook works for me. It doesn't work for him and that is okay.  

So yeahhhh, I did read it on Facebook. Anyone who uses that as an insult is either a troll or a person who does not see the potential and value of people posting articles from independent sources. No longer do we have to be a pawn in the emotional ping pong reports on television. No longer is the shameful drivel in mainstream media the only thing we can access. Once you have friends with similar interests, the collection of information is enormous. It's up to us to look at it, to look at our friend's different perspectives and wisdom, to look behind the media's curtain to get to truth, to empathize with friends even if we do not agree with their opinion, to see stranger's sides of the story. 

Donny Miller said, "In the age of information, ignorance is a choice." Well so is close-minded, egoistic behavior. We don't need to Internet bully people to discuss something. That's just silly. If you are going to lose friends, let it be because you have drifted apart just like happens in "real life", not because you wrote something hurtful. Discussions are great, even heated ones, just use words wisely. Virtual villages are forming. Cross lines and see each other. I did read it on Facebook and the people I know who did the same are some of the wisest and most well-rounded people I know. Think about it this way.... I finished college in 1995. Would anyone have said back then "Well you just read that at the library" like it was an insult? When we choose to not only read things that support our opinion, Facebook and the Internet are libraries. 

How we use it is up to us. Some just want social interaction with people they can't regularly see and there isn't anything wrong with that. Some of us want kindred spirits with whom to discuss and share our hearts. Nothing wrong with that either. Some of us want to learn. Nothing wrong with that. Just know that there are movements all over Facebook and you can find one that aligns with what you would really like to see different in the world. Many of these are leading from the heart space and will find a way to not just be the change, but make the change. Change starts with seeds. I read about a lot of seeds on Facebook. Some have already grown into trees. 

Funny thing is I think social media was gifted to us to distract us and divide us and there is plenty of that out there, but through the fog, I see the light workers and peace warriors and world changers gathering together for the greater good. I think that was unexpected from those who wish to control the information as they are paying people to come in to try to divide us again. Seems the human spirit, our souls were underestimated. It appears that even the introverted still have a need to be connected to the Universe and a higher power. The fog is lifting as we slice through it...  

Humph. I read it on Facebook. Yes I did. Then I researched some more and learned something. I even changed my mind about a few things. Crazy right?      

Clean Up

Clean up, clean up, EVERYbody clean up… songs from preschool that stick in my head.

You know that moment when you find out someone is coming over and you totally panic because keeping up with a house with children is, as my sister says, like shoveling snow in a blizzard? For those of you that have help, good for you! For those of you who somehow manage to keep up, good for you! I mean that because I don’t. I can’t. What I learned quickly is I could make myself INSANE or accept that motherhood is dirty. It just is and that is okay. I aim for sanitary and content from all family members, for everyone to be reasonably happy with their space.

Or there’s that moment you walk into someone else’s house and see that their house is sanitary but a bit or a lot disheveled like your own. Do you walk in and point out what’s wrong or do you walk in and say something to make them feel better about the mess when you notice they start to apologize for it? Most of the people I know would walk in and say something to make them feel better, maybe even admitting they had not cleaned X in months or even a year. “Don’t worry about it.”

My point is not about how clean your house is or is not. I just want people to give the same courtesy when discussing current events. Why is it that people are so skilled at pointing out flaws in everyone else’s opinion without looking within their own once in awhile? I’m not perfect. I’ve done that at times, but because I recognized I have done that, now I try VERY hard to be open minded to see both sides, to empathize. I see so many people when discussing issues just point fingers, never owning that their opinion’s house might need a lil dusting. It doesn’t make any sense to me. If you wouldn’t walk in to a friend’s house and tell them it looked like shite, then why would you call out everything that is wrong with their opinion and beliefs and act like your opinion and beliefs are just perfect… that the people you believe in have done no wrong, that only one side of an issue is riddled with problems. Why is it SO hard to admit that your team makes mistakes? We all have free choice to believe in whom and what we choose, but we as a culture need more empathy to understand each other. We lift each other up. That’s how change happens.   

It’s okay to agree to disagree, but be genuine in listening. Otherwise we’re just stuck chanting “You suck”. “No YOU suck.” “You suck more!” Last time I checked no problems got solved that way. We must identify flaws on our side of the fence to find middle ground. I dunno. I’m so over team colors and all that has come with the constant divisive competitive culture. This country trains our children early about win or lose. It’s pushed in their face all around them. The media feeds it and it’s working. People care more about the win than what happened to get there. My opinion… there is no win or lose unless we are all thriving. Both sides of any issue should see their own dirt. Then, THEN, we can all work on the clean up together.

Whatever side of anything you stand on, try something. Try imagining standing on the other side of an issue and looking in the window towards your side. See what needs cleaned. Feel how the other side feels. We need to see each other again. Maybe, jusssst maybe, some day you will change your mind about something and have to admit you were wrong. That’s okay too. Who of us has never believed in something that turned out to be wrong? I do not call them mistakes. I call them lessons, things we needed to learn along our way. Thing is if we close our minds so tightly so nothing new gets in, we may never learn that lesson. These kind of things repeat in our lives, get stored in our DNA and carry on longer than our eyes can see.

Since I fell down with dis-ease, I had to open my mind up to begin this journey of healing. I thought I WAS open minded, but what I found was there was a lot of dust in my opinions that needed cleaned up with truth. I was wrong about some things. I trusted some who never earned my trust. I thought some were friends who never were. I was dis-eased with programming I didn’t know was there. It happened so quietly. I also found people I needed. I continue to find myself. I continue to find blessings. I continue to learn from people I didn’t see before. My house is still dusty and needs some cleaning, but I see you. I hope you see me too. I hope you see others who you are not truly seeing after you read this. Change starts within us and then we clean up this world together.